Welcome to 2018! Glei and I hope you all enjoyed the holidays, and got some (probably) much needed rest – we know we did.
We here at the Trichotillomania Relief Specialists™ would like to thank you VERY much for your readership and viewership over this past year. For however long you may have been a subscriber to one of our several educational outlets, we sincerely hope we’ve been able to provide you with meaningful information, resources and support in your efforts to reclaim control of your hair-pulling challenges.
Perhaps most importantly, we hope this is the year you decide to do whatever it takes to break free from this terribly self-destructive behavior called trichotillomania.
A Look Back, And A Look Forward
While our busy schedule precluded our ability to publish as many videos as we would have liked last year, still, we published on average about once a month. Some of them clearly stood out as the most popular (based on viewership numbers at YouTube).
So Glei and I did what we always do at this time of year, which is to review what it was that seemed to strike a chord for our viewers – if there was an overarching theme of interest, what was that?
Here are our 5 most popular videos from 2017 (starting with the one that was most viewed – by FAR, as it turns out):
Which of these titles draws YOU in the most?
Our Two Most Important Take-Aways
1. Generally speaking, people care a LOT about what it takes to break free from trichotillomania.
That seems to start with the question of whether it’s possible to even do such a thing.
To a man, the conventional mental health community seems to hold out little hope that trichotillomania is something that can truly be conquered. All you need do is a quick review of online resources relating to trichotillomania, and it’s evident they regard trichotillomania as a chronic condition that may wax and wane in intensity, but that never truly disappears.
Kinda like herpes, I guess.
Without naming names, this disempowering belief system unfortunately extends even to the best known, most popular information and resource organizations to serve specifically the Body Focused Repetitive Behavior community.
So if all you hear are stories of doom and gloom, no wonder you’d be as concerned as you are – OK, maybe downright scared – at the prospect that this is something you may never be able to escape no matter what you do or how hard you try.
Turns Out The Earth Is Not Flat After All
Fortunately, we here at the Trichotillomania Relief Specialists™ never bought into this line of thinking. In fact, to us, “can’t” is a four-letter word we do our best to stay away from at all times.
I remember the first time we got a call from someone seeking help for trichotillomania. This was way back in 2006, even before there WAS such a thing as the Trichotillomania Relief Specialists.
This call came in from a woman whose 15-year-old daughter had been struggling with trichotillomania since she was 5! They had taken her everywhere over the course of the previous ten years, including the Mayo Clinic. By the time she called us, everyone else had thrown up their hands and given up on her.
At the time, Glei and I had become pretty well known for our work with the most challenging possible expressions of anxiety. So this woman had been referred to us by several people who had worked with us in the past to them them resolve their anxiety issues.
I remember inquiring of this woman if she’d ever asked her daughter why she keeps pulling her hair, even though she says she wants to stop. The woman said yes, she had. The answer?
“She says she just can’t help it.”
And I remember thinking to myself, “You can’t tell me that a person really can’t help reaching up, grabbing their hair and pulling it out.”
But it’s incredibly important that if you’re going to see someone for help with this, that they too don’t also believe you can’t help pulling your hair out!
I mean, if your therapist or doctor also doesn’t believe you can help it, why should you have any reason to think they’re going to be able to help you break free from this – especially for good?
My point is that the beliefs of the person (or company) you’re going to go see for help with this has everything to do with the outcome you can expect as a result of doing so.
Raise The Bar on Your Expectations
Best you interview a prospective helping professional first before you go to work with them. Very simply, ask them (a) what you can expect as a result of your work with them, and (b) how long they expect it to take for you to achieve your desired result.
If they say things like:
- “Well, we’ll do the best we can…”
- “It’s probably going to take some time…”
- “I’ve worked with a few people with trichotillomania…”
Or, if they just come right out and say something like, “The truth is, this is probably something you’re just going to have to learn to live with…” – that’s NOT the kind of thing you want to be hearing, right??
Our best advice: Make sure the beliefs of the person you’re going to see for help with trichotillomania match as closely as possible the outcome you hope to achieve as a result of your work with them.
2. Chronic problems with (what feels like) uncontrollable hair pulling can be terribly damaging to one’s self-esteem.
In the vast majority of cases, people who pull their hair have decided their inability to stop means there’s something wrong with them, as people. It starts to feel like a personality, or character flaw.
And it hurts – it hurts so much, it turns out folks spend A LOT of time looking for information online about how to feel better.
So you see, the damage done by chronic hair-pulling is not at all limited just to the physical side of things – but also very much to the emotional and psychological sides as well.
Of course, our primary objective here at the Trichotillomania Relief Specialists is always to help a client break free from the pulling activity itself, and to help effect that result as soon as possible.
Yet imagine the relief along the way when we help clients realize that they are not their behaviors – be those behaviors “good”, “bad” or indifferent.
We as human beings are much, much more than just the things we do.
In fact, there’s a reason we’re called human beings, and not human doings, right?
And that’s so important, because while it may be pretty challenging to change who we inherently are as people, we can always change the things we do – even virtually overnight.
And hair-pulling is just something you do. It’s not who you are as a person.
There’s so much more to you than just a person who pulls their hair. 🙂
Curious to learn more about these topics? Click on the links above to watch each of our five most popular videos of 2017.
Hit the “Comment” button below and let us know what you think!
How does this message impact you? How can you use it to help yourself or a loved one?
Have questions about trichotillomania you’d like us to address in future blog posts? Visit our Question and Answers Page here.
For more information about how we can assist you to eliminate trichotillomania as an issue in your life far more quickly and easily than you probably ever imagined possible, please visit our website and fill out a contact form. You can also call our 24-hour toll-free voicemail messaging service at any time of day or night at (866) LIFE-NOW. We’ll return your call at our very first opportunity.